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SOAPBOX: Carlsberg: Poring Over Useless Politicians

by Jimmy Rhatigan

If Carlsberg produced useless politicians, it would still reach No. 2 only in the world’s worst league.
The No. 1 spot in any league of chaos and controversy has always been, is and more than likely will be the domain of the collection of chancers, with a few notable exceptions, who inhabit Kildare Street.
Most may believe that things could not get worse in the Dáil but there is still so much nodding and winking that any new negative political story has a lifespan of mere minutes, possibly seconds.
The tale, gargantuan or trivial is nigh instantly as dead as a Dodo as real journalists, not those who genuflect or curtsey to politicians, bankers and their ilk, break newsworthy stories as opposed to relying on press releases or re-hashes.
Stand up and take a bow Liam Deegan, Gene Kerrigan, Eamonn McCann, Terry McGeehan and Eoin Ó Murchú.

A DYING BREED IN FOURTH ESTATE
The latter are warriors among a dying breed in a Fourth Estate that has fallen down the divisions at provincial level, snuggling up to its oft grubby masters, and is struggling on the national stage.
A case in point is the Covid-19 pandemic where so-called experts in medicine, eminent medics as some might term them, are seldom asked any daring questions, the ones that people just might like answered.
Some publications go one better by giving medics columns of their own, similar to the lazy journalism of giving carte blanche to politicians,
Public representatives, big, tiny and in between, should be in the dock of life and certainly not on stage.
That Fine Gael and Fianna Fáil in particular are pro big business and fellow money bags, there is no doubt.
Tanáiste Leo Varadkar in particular has made it quite clear that he doesn’t trust those who receive social welfare in our country.
AL CAPONE WITH A SIX-SHOOTER
His utterings would suggest that inside each and every one of these mostly good people, social welfare recipients that is, is an Al Capone bursting to get loose with a six-shooter.
A man on what is popularly the dole would be vilified for accepting a tenner for a drink after digging a small back garden.
Call the Gardai, summon the Armed Support Unit and the Special Branch.
Set up a tribunal; the uncouth are on tour and their dirty fingers are accepting payment while the State is filling their pockets.
Amazing stuff when we consider all the tribunals that have been held following acts of what we might call real criminality and every bob paid to legal eagles was wasted.
Look at how former Debenhams workers are being treated or rather ill-treated.
The modern day masters of draconian methods and cruel punishment, FF, FG and Greens once more put a bill to give workers a better deal on hold for at least another year.

WHAT A DOSE OF TWO-FACED MORONS
What a dose of two-faced morons who slink as near as possible to hearses at local family funerals and then bury knives in the backs of local workers.
Transparency is a word that probably doesn’t feature in too many politicians’ dictionaries.
It is oft used by those who may fancy themselves as the wise ones; abused too as a political football when there is a game of trickery to be played.
At this stage, families who have to battle for a living, those not born with silver spoons in their mouths, must realize that Fianna Fáil and FG are so often toxic.
Feel for the Debenhams employees who are being pushed around and abused as they seek justice.
Look at the pretend rubbish that is being propagated by Minister Darragh O’Brien and FF in particular as he and his party say they are on the side of those wishing to buy their own homes.
At the same time FF licks up to vultures and their allies in evil and injustice who were invited to Ireland by Michael Noonan and FG.
THE BACKSIDE POWDER TEAM IN FF
That there is a bigger picture for FG and their backside powder team in FF, there is no doubt.
Their plan does not and never will include making life even a smidgen more comfortable for hard working parents and their children.
As so many in both parties are deeply involved in big business, in property, particularly house renting, it is obvious that the aim is to bury trade unions, to ignore the plight of a majority of our people outside of the Golden Circle and to ignore first-time buyers.
Aim is to ensure that the rich get richer and those who have not, or are no better than slaves to a corrupt system are simply cast aside.
A move in the right direction to cleaning up the present mess would be to ignore FF and FG at election time and also to keep our distance from the Greens that, like the former pair, have turned Judas on us so many times.

WE NEED A NEW POLITICS
That would be a super start, provided of course our people have the guts and determination to carry out such an operation.
But, a plan would not solve any problems on its own.
What we need is a new politics where the people we elect answer to us, their paymasters, and not vice versa, as has been the case since the birth of our State.
Just as politicians warn us to keep rules, they too should be made to toe the line particularly when it comes to voting bills that can affect all our lives.
A great start in any rehab programme would be to ban Ministers and TDs from voting on any aspect of Dáil business in which they have their snouts in a particular trough.
In other words, property owners would automatically excuse themselves from voting on housing and related construction; publicans would not vote on bar industry issues and farmers would keep mum or in layman’s lingo, shut their mouths on agriculture.
STATE PENSION LIKE THE REST OF US
Not declaring commercial interests would, when exposed, lead to automatic expulsion from the Dáil without any old pals’ parting gifts or lump sums.
Truants who break any new rules would however be entitled to a State pension on the same terms as the rest of us.
Now we would be edging towards real democracy.
It would be a mere baby step in a journey of miles to give our people governance we could trust.
Changes would eventually be a help to trade unions, to community groups and to local small business that faces a torrid time post Covid.
We cannot settle on any promises from politicians.
We simply don’t trust them.
Any agreements would have to be signed on the dotted line.
Those we elect can meet us half-way in any efforts at proper communications and respect between leaders and people.
Failure on the part of politicians to play ball would mean a Plan B for our people.
We have a suggestion.
Plan B should be to sack the whole bloody lot of them.
Then the real trouble starts!

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