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Yanks Fly In As ‘Grange Boys Banned

by Jimmy Rhatigan

It has to be the irony of all ironies.
The St Paddy’s Festival beauty of local buildings highlighted in the green of our dear old Erin’s Isle cannot be enjoyed by country cousins living in local bailiwicks like Bennettsbridge, Cuffesgrange and Callan.
The 5k pandemic travel ban means that the green spectacles, specially lit up to celebrate the feast of St Patrick are out of bounds for thousands on the peripheral of our city.
Yet, the green displays, rivals, we are told, for the spectacular Aurora Borealis, will be enjoyed and photographed god only knows how many million times by Yanks on tour.
Americans, armed with cameras will receive a hearty céad míle fáilte at our airports after jetting in from a Covid-ridden US.
Yet as the lads and lassies in Kells, ‘Comer and Graigue Ballycallan continue to cocoon and are monitored by measuring tape-carrying Gardai, the Yanks amble around our city akin to peacocks answering a mating call.
There are many crazy anomalies in a pandemic public check list but surely the travel tomfoolery beats Banagher.
You might check on that one Garda.
The notion is that Banagherites will not be turned on by our lights either!

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