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Murph Goes Online From Print: Bunion And All

by Jimmy Rhatigan

Mrs Murphy is very excited today.

Since the 1970s she has written a column in local newspapers and says she has enjoyed every minute of her print journey.

Today, she is online for the first time and is really looking forward to the experience.

She first started writing circa 43 years ago at the invitation of then Kilkenny People journalist Jimmy Rhatigan who invited her to be part of the Write on Rhatigan experience.

“At first I wasn’t sure where it was all leading for me but the fun aspect really tickled my fancy particularly when I would give readers regular news updates on the state of the bunion on my left foot.

“My friends at bingo, at a time when it was safe to play the game, used to get a great kick out of jibing me about the column and in particularly ribbing me about what they called the most famous bunion in Ireland.

MURPH IS NOT A HAPPY CAMPER

“Whether or not it was famous, I am not so sure, but what I am certain of is that it was always painful and was almost as hard to calm down as it was to win a bit of cash at a bingo that was then held in the old Carlton Ballroom.”

As with practically all pensioners nowadays, Mrs Murphy spends most of her time indoors.

She is not a happy camper but she is content that the love of her life, His Nibs is still in reasonable good fettle and is good company.

The pair of them are still as much in love with each other as they were when they went to the pictures in the one-time Savoy Cinema that is now the Watergate Theatre.

She craves a bit of freedom, an amble in the grounds of Kilkenny Castle or a stroll down the Canal Walk where His Nibs brought her on so many afternoons in the ago to listen to popular tunes by musicians on a music stand that is still part of the canal furniture.

I STILL DO A BIT OF KNITTING

She has fingers and toes crossed that the vaccine which she should get shortly as an octogenarian, will give people back their lives and signal the end of a cruel world catastrophe that hardly anyone saw coming.

“I enjoy watching telly, I still do a bit of knitting and I really enjoy talking to our grandchildren on the ‘phone.

“Now I have a new project to pass the time. I am positive about moving from print to online.

My only concern is that I know some of my friends do not own computers so they won’t get to read my piece.

“Please god when the bingo gets going again those who miss the real thing will be able to catch up during the intermission.

“That is of course providing that we will be allowed to gather in groups again for an evening of what Mrs Brown calls ‘eyes down’.

“Or we can log on to Martin Cornally’s brilliant online bingo which is going great guns.

“How about that, log on, doesn’t take me long to learn new tricks.”

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